MARVIN LUVUALU

Toronto / Artist / Self-isolation
Marvin Luvualu Antonio is an Angolan-Canadian artist who lives and works in Toronto, Canada.

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I was having a dream. It was my family and, in the dream, I couldn’t tell if it was my real family or not. A husband and wife and two daughters. I was the wife. A very nice home. Like a set for a tv show. We are going on about something, the husband and I. The children are scared about something and I am consoling them, telling them that I am scared too, and this is why they have to follow the rules so that we can stay safe and take care of each other. But someone/something interrupts the scene and tells me it is fake or not real and tells me I shouldn’t be so morbid with the kids. But that my act with my husband is believable. I am offended by the comment about the children and I begin a monologue about how it is necessary to teach our children about the violence of the world and during this speech I am heading towards and entering the laundry room. I wake up at this point. I feel like I’m having a hard time sleeping and that my mind is active. Only a minute after waking up do I realise that I woke from a dream and it was to pee. I also realise that I had another dream. It felt like I was having two at the same time or alternating because I couldn’t tell which came first. In this dream I’m watching a wedding unfold. It is Dana (an artist I know) and her partner’s wedding. It’s outside. I’m watching them. They’re in a field. Dana and a friend are hiding under a bushy, willowy tree. Her fiancé is walking past them with his best friend. His best friend has his arm around him. It is sunny. A beautiful scene. Summer. Dana jumps out and scares them. They all laugh. This entire scene is in slow motion. Next, I’m with her. I am her. She is looking at me and laughing with me. I’m dancing in slow motion. We dance together. Her mother is trying to take a photograph of us. And then comes along another Dana. Beautiful. And I laugh and ask why Dana is wearing a different outfit. In the dream I sense my embarrassment as the Dana next to me reminds me that they are twins.

(23/3/2020)